Vol. 1, Issue 21, October 7, 2003
Fizzy Tea Hits the Spot
Studio8

California's Fragile State of Affairs

Ezekiel F. Watley, Esq.

To-day is one of those Remarkable days when every good American adult (yes, even the Women!) may exercise the unalienable Right that makes our great Nation unique, at least for those of us in the Golden State of California. And I too am part of this Marvel; for as I drape the old Bunting out my study Window and put on my best Voting-Hat, I nonetheless set forth from my Door with a heavy Heart.

I am a Candidate in to-day's Election, and I have made my positions Clear; in particular, my Alphabetic Tax Proposal has met with significant Interest down at the Club. But though I stand ready to lead this great State should I win, and withdraw Gracefully should I not, I yet cannot help but Think that the whole Recall Election were but a Symptom of a great Illness that grips this Mightiest of States.

Democracy is like a Delicacy to be Savored; but just as Gluttony remains one of the seven Sins (the efforts of the French notwithstanding) an Excess of the noble Vote may lead to Gastric Distress as well. Our state is Unique in its ability to easily pass Referendums as binding as any Law; the People are a de facto Fourth Branch of Government, and the result is a Patchwork quilt of Legislation that No Man can navigate without many, many Drams of scotch.

Californians voted to limit Property Tax Revenues, but cry out now in Righteous Anger two decades Later as the effects of lower Spending are made plain in a failing School system; the Cause and Effect are too Distant for most to Appreciate. Actually, California law-makers are simply unable to make policies for many issues, for every other Year a new slate of Referendums does the Job.

To paraphrase my associate Alexis, The omnipotence of the Majority and the rapid as well as absolute Manner in which its decisions are Executed here not only renders the law Unstable, but exercises the same Influence upon the Execution of the law and the Conduct of the administration.

The fifth-largest Economy in the World cannot be Driven by the feckless will of the political Moment, nor can the foundation for a golden Future be laid down Piecemeal. Without commenting on the Merits of either the Incumbent in to-day's Election or the campaign which led to this Recall Election, I will say that it has been alarmingly Easy to bring the matter to a Vote. If it were Likewise with our President, I can assure you I would be Drinking a lot More than I do. Which my Doctor has advised me not to Do, for fear I shall spontaneously Combust as a result.

Fellow Californians, I do ask you to Ponder these issues as you cast your Ballots. And for everyone Else in the Nation, you may on This day be well and duly Smug in the fact that you do not Live Here. I hope, at least, we are Entertaining you.


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